Thursday, September 5, 2013

How many “Oopsies” Do We Get?

I received an email the other day informing me about a writer’s conference. A few minutes later, I got another message with the title “Oops.” The sender had forgotten to include the date of the meeting. A rather significant omission, right?

That got me to thinking. As the co-host of a Monday afternoon Writing Class, I often send emails to my list of attendees. I recall a number of them with the subject of “Oops” because of an error or an omission I'd made.

That brings about a few other revelations. Now, I’m trying to decide whether this spate of incomplete, inaccurate, or downright wrong information is a function of a scattered brain or age. My hope is for the former, of course. Perhaps…just perhaps…I can do something about that one. Age just scoots on down the proverbial road bringing inevitable consequences…until it doesn’t. My post of August 15 is a reminder of how abruptly that can run its course.

As an aside, the Writing Class held a moment of silence for Digby Henry, our missing member, and then fondly called up special remembrances of the delightful man. We read a touching poem he wrote entitled “evening earthturn” in his honor. He was extraordinary and will be missed by all.

With this train of thought rolling, let me recall a few of my more recent foibles, some of which have been shared on the blog or with the class or with family…or with no one.

Let’s see…

  • There was the to-do about my new washing machine refusing to work the way I wanted it to. Turned out it was working the way I instructed it to. The damned thing should have known I wanted my clothes washed even if I did turn the indicator to Final Spin/Dry. The store’s repair shop is probably still laughing about that one.

  • I told some of you about playing skip-the-rope with a gas hose. Instead of walking around the car, I tried to step over the hose. The hose won. That spill sent me back to physical therapy, and I'm still not walking quite as well as before.

  • I usually back my auto into the parking space at the apartment complex because it is easier (and safer) to simply pull out whenever I leave. The other day, I pulled out and slammed on the brakes. I’d gone blind! I couldn’t see the road. Then I realized I’d forgotten to take the sun shield down from the windshield. Glad no one was around. My cheeks were rather rosy as I sat in the middle of the main drive to correct the situation. Then I sat there for another few minutes laughing my head off.

  • I came home from the supermarket with an armful of groceries and stood in front of my door wondering why it wouldn’t open. Turned out I was pushing the unlock button on my Buick’s remote. This time, I had to drop the groceries and run for the bathroom. Uncontrolled mirth and a full bladder do not a good mix make.

  • I don’t know how many times I’ve answered the TV remote or tried to dial a channel on my telephone. In this electronic world with a myriad of little black boxes sitting around, that might not be too unusual for many of us. But sitting for five minutes wondering why the damned thing doesn’t work probably is. My recovery time has slowed.
 
  • I dog-sit a little black and white Papillion named Gizmo, and the other day he interrupted me at the computer to let me know he had an urgent need to go to the bathroom. Dogs are not supposed to have facial expressions, but his was clearly one of disgust when I led him to my bathroom. After I sheepishly took him outside, things came out all right. Gizz hasn’t messed in the apartment but once, and that was payback for my leaving him alone for an extended period of time. He tolerates my occasional absence, but that time, I clearly violated our set of unspoken rules. We kissed and made up, anyway.

  • Can't forget falling off my shoes. Impossible you say? Only a klutz would do that? Thank you for making my point. I have a pair of moccasin-style black dress shoes with soles shorter and narrower than the shoe, itself. The other day I was walking down the sidewalk and turned my ankle. I'd have fallen off my shoes if there hadn't been a concrete wall there to catch my fall.

I’m sure I can come up with other “Oopsies” but this is embarrassment enough for one blog. If you wish to confess your own awkward moments, please do so, using the Post a Comment section. Everyone have a good week.

 

Next week: I have no idea.

New posts are published at 6:00 a.m. each Thursday.

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